Successful Negotiating Made Easy

You may not even know this, but everyday you use your negotiating skills.  Have you ever asked the plumber to discount his repair bill or asked if there are any special room rates available at the hotel you're planning to stay at?  Have you ever interviewed for a position or asked your boss for a raise?  In every situation you NEGOTIATED your position.  Many times in our careers, we pass up great opportunities to get a promotion, get a raise or get better assignments because we don't: 1) SEE the opportunity to ask for a better situation or 2) we don't feel comfortable ASKING for the better situation.  If we were more confident about our sales skills (yes, it boils down to just plain old sales), we can control our destiny rather than feeling other people (like our boss, our coworkers, even the plumber) are in the driver's seat.  You may think you don't have the "makings" of a super sales person, but successful negotiating can be broken down into these simple elementary steps:

Know Your "Stuff" – Do your homework!  Gather all the facts BEFORE you start negotiating.  Anticipate questions and know the answers beforehand.  For example, if you are asking for a raise, research the salary ranges of your particular position.  If possible, make copies of the supporting documents to show them during your negotiations.

Don't Argue with the Other Person – This is one of the secrets to successful negotiating.  It is natural to start arguing with the other person when they disagree with you – Fight the Urge!  Arguing with someone only puts them on the defensive.  If the other person is upset and on the defensive, they are no longer "open" to hearing what you have to say – you've lost.  When the other person disagrees with you (anticipate this will happen), get on their side.  Example:  If your boss says, "I can't give you a raise, because your coworker, Bob, didn't get one".  You say, "You're right.  Bob may not have gotten a raise and you had a very good reason why he didn't.  In my situation….."

Persuade the Other Person to "Show Their Hand" First – This is especially crucial if you are negotiating numbers such as determining your starting salary at a new job.  The problem with establishing the starting negotiating number is that you may come in too low or too high, but you will never know until it is too late.  If the other person "shows their hand" first, you will be able to establish the range in which you can negotiate.  Whenever anyone starts negotiating, they have a range in mind and they will always start at the bottom of that range.  Once you know that number, work your strategy around it.  If it is near your number continue negotiating.  If there is a large gap, move away from negotiating the number and keep building your case with more facts.

Predetermine Your "Drop Dead" Number – It is important to establish the bottom number you will accept…and stick to it.  If you don't have a number in mind before you start negotiating, you will find yourself accepting a lower number than you wanted to.  It is easy to get caught up in the negotiating process and lose track of the purpose of your meeting.   

If You're at a Stalemate, Meet the Other Person Halfway – In most negotiations, there must be a winner and a loser.  However, sometimes you can have a "Win-Win" situation, by conceding to dividing the difference between your number and the other person's number.  This way both parties feel like winners, because they did not have to completely give up their positions.  Many deals have been saved by offering to "split the difference".  If you can accept the midpoint and you feel the negotiations are stalling, offer to split the difference.  Most reasonable negotiators will accept your offer.